So often, we get caught in the hustle and bustle of everyday life without stopping to reflect on ourselves. Not in a self-centered way, but just failing to check in with ourselves to see how we’re really feeling. You owe it to yourself to be introspective and seek answers or solutions to the problems you have in your life.

In today’s society, reflecting too much on ourselves while not operating under the guise of mental health is seen as selfish or vain; I personally believe it is necessary. Rather than accept the hands that you’ve been dealt when facing challenging situations, I encourage you to try to find a solution that works best for you simply because you deserve it.

Today, I turn 23 and I have decided to live the life I want for myself. I am done being unnecessarily apologetic, too kind, too selfless, and keeping myself from living my truth. 22 was a hell of a year with way more lows than highs, but I made it through and I feel like I should really claim 23 as MY year. I’m done appeasing others or staying in situations that have hindered me rather than helped me, but if nothing else I can say I’ve learned, I’ve loved, I’ve made mistakes, yet I regret nothing. It was hard to accept all the negatives and view them as growth when it felt like all I was doing was going backward.

I say all of this to say, create the world you want for yourself because you are worthy of that much. I know that this sounds much easier said than done, but there is no reason to live a life that you’re unhappy with when there are aspects that you can change. Sometimes things may not be feasible, but if you can set a plan in action to take the steps you need to make the change, then you’re already moving in the right direction.

People often tell me that in this world, everybody needs somebody. I agree to some extent, but this is my caveat to that: What happens when the people you expect to show up for simply cannot or will not? At that point, being dependent does nothing more than put you on someone else’s schedule and allows them to help you at their earliest convenience. Being my own cheerleader has never been easy, but when I think about the things I’ve been through, I can say that if no one else is proud of me, I am. Every time you make the conscious decision not to give up on yourself, you’re being your own cheerleader and that’s incredibly important. I cannot stress this enough — show up for yourself. The life you lead is the life you’ll reflect on over many points in your life but, it is important to feel like you’ve done things that have mattered to you, that have made you proud, and things that have made a difference. Leave a mark on the world even if you’re the only one that appreciates it.

Take care of yourself. You matter.

 

It is the peculiar nature of the world to go on spinning no matter what sort of heartbreak is happening. – Sue Monk Kidd | The Secret Life of Bees